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#44990 - 09/08/15 06:11 PM Re: Giggles [Re: Private Klink]
Carl Theile Offline
Survivor
Rattus norvegicus

Registered: 05/09/12
Posts: 5883
Loc: Outside, anywhere
Originally Posted By: Private Klink
"Recent studies show that women who carry a few extra pounds live longer than the men who mention it".


Great one, Klink!

-carl
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Survivor- Old School Swamp Rat (2003)

You are not out of options until you quit.

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#45001 - 09/09/15 01:52 AM Re: Giggles [Re: Carl Theile]
Private Klink Online   content
Die Hard Rat

Registered: 05/08/12
Posts: 3433
Loc: S/W Missouri
And true! grin
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#45006 - 09/09/15 09:36 AM Re: Giggles [Re: RobStanley]
Drumrboy Offline
Die Hard Rat

Registered: 05/08/12
Posts: 4900
Loc: Always on the move
A man and his wife were about to go out for a party.
The wife says to her husband “I can’t find my keys.”

“It’s in your jeans, love.” He replied

“Don’t you bring my family into this, you bastard.”
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Old School Swamp Rat

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#45007 - 09/09/15 09:36 AM Re: Giggles [Re: RobStanley]
Drumrboy Offline
Die Hard Rat

Registered: 05/08/12
Posts: 4900
Loc: Always on the move
Five unshakable facts:Five Unshakable Facts

1. A girl is said to be grown up when she starts wearing a bra. A boy is grown up when he starts removing them.

2. We all love to spend lots of money buying new clothes but we never realize that the best moments in life are enjoyed without clothes.

3. Having a cold drink on hot day with a few friends is nice, but having a hot friend on a cold night after a few drinks – PRICELESS.

4. Breaking News: Condoms don’t guarantee safe sex anymore. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was killed by the woman’s husband.

5. Arguing over a girl’s breast size is like choosing between Molson, Heineken, Carlsberg & Budweiser. Men may state their preferences, but will grab whatever is available.
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Old School Swamp Rat

Never Stop Trying

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#45023 - 09/10/15 12:29 AM Re: Giggles [Re: Drumrboy]
Private Klink Online   content
Die Hard Rat

Registered: 05/08/12
Posts: 3433
Loc: S/W Missouri
Words of wisdom! laugh
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#45061 - 09/12/15 11:53 PM Re: Giggles [Re: RobStanley]
Trumby Online   content
Aussie Bush Rat
Die Hard Rat

Registered: 05/08/12
Posts: 4747
Loc: NSW
Riddle for seniors...

Today's riddle for seniors ... Here is the situation:

You are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed.

On your right side is a sharp drop-off.

On your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you.

Directly in front of you is a galloping kangaroo and your horse is unable to overtake it.

Behind you is a lion running at the same speed as you and the kangaroo.

What must you do to get out of this highly dangerous situation?

Get off the merry-go-round and go home, you silly old fart!
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Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but to skid in sideways, worn out, shouting 'holy $hit what a ride'! cool

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#45062 - 09/13/15 12:42 PM Re: Giggles [Re: RobStanley]
Carl Theile Offline
Survivor
Rattus norvegicus

Registered: 05/09/12
Posts: 5883
Loc: Outside, anywhere
... smile

-carl
_________________________
Survivor- Old School Swamp Rat (2003)

You are not out of options until you quit.

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#45075 - 09/13/15 08:53 PM Re: Giggles [Re: Carl Theile]
Private Klink Online   content
Die Hard Rat

Registered: 05/08/12
Posts: 3433
Loc: S/W Missouri
See?!!!? Works for Carl! laugh laugh laugh
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#45077 - 09/14/15 08:42 AM Re: Giggles [Re: RobStanley]
Drumrboy Offline
Die Hard Rat

Registered: 05/08/12
Posts: 4900
Loc: Always on the move
As he lay on his deathbed, the man confided to his wife, “I cannot die without telling you the truth. I cheated on you throughout our whole marriage. All those nights when I told you I was working late, I was with other women. And not just one woman either, but I’ve slept with dozens of them.” His wife looked at him calmly and said, “Why do you think I gave you the poison?”
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Old School Swamp Rat

Never Stop Trying

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#45078 - 09/14/15 10:19 AM Re: Giggles [Re: RobStanley]
Carl Theile Offline
Survivor
Rattus norvegicus

Registered: 05/09/12
Posts: 5883
Loc: Outside, anywhere
Gotta take it where I can, Klink. Your day is coming. smile smile

-carl


Edited by Carl Theile (09/14/15 10:19 AM)
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Survivor- Old School Swamp Rat (2003)

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